Archive for July, 2010

afloat (draft)

//edit: this post is wrong. The more I think about it, the more the terms should be switched. …but it’s worth not deleting as a post because it’s pretty revealing of my tendency to go against the grain—instead of being categorized as another college student “coasting,” I wanted to be considered in different terms.

But I’m just the same, we’re all the saaaameeeee

 

I find myself coasting again. Except coasting, as a college term, proffers a sense of confident lackadaisy.

I think a more appropriate word for my funk is “floating.”
It requires little/no effort, letting the current take me along.┬áBut there’s still the danger of going under…

I thought I was content before. Now, I feel like I’m failing to achieve something else, something outside of what I’ve already experienced. something “greater” in a sense. I’m just not lining up to who I thought I’d be by now.

The usual remedy:

  • looking up menial jobs on craigslist, germany
  • planning out the rest of my course plan
  • cutting my hair
  • googling cities for future potential home

…now where did i put those scissors?

Visiting Southern California and seeing a completely different landscape and housing layout made me realize the environment I’d like to inhabit–0ne pretty much completely different from the socal landscape.

I want somewhere cold, as in seasons. And a densely packed city with activity and access. To be surrounded by civilization, yet having my own space. Detached, but efficient. That’s why I’m thinking European cities would be perfect. Ideally, somewhere Scandinavian, but I wouldn’t even mind blustery, overcast London. Though I really do like the cyclical changes of seasons, seems more natural to me.